Who's going to be the crazy broad in the prom dress?  Hopefully, this year, it won't be you.  Stay away from any attire that says "bridesmaid."  On the other hand, stay away from fishnet stockings, or garments that imply sexual fetishism.  You may be getting tons of attention in that tight, low-cut neon dress with stripes and spots, but it may be the wrong kind of attention.  There's such a thing as a "career limiting move," say experts.  Don’t be the office hottie in a sheer dress that shows off your underwear.  Birkenstocks, however, won’t do either.  Stay away from the "hippie" look.  Always wear a bra, especially with silk or rayon.  Cotton and wool are always sensible solutions.

That doesn't mean you can't have fun.  Having fun is the one rule you can never break!  When someone who matters says to you, "Maybe those fishnet stockings aren't such a bad idea," you shouldn’t necessarily assume it's a joke.  If Joe is below Sally, and Sally is above Krandal, and you report to Joe, who is below Krandal, but who you know Sally is going to promote to Krandal’s position (Krandal will be fired), then you should wear the fishnet stockings when Joe or Sally suggests it, and you should not when Krandal suggests it, even though Krandal is your boss, and Joe is technically your inferior.

If someone does get drunk and tries to hit on you, the next day, pretend that you were drunk too, and you don’t remember much of anything from the big party.

And fellas, if someone who matters says you've got cute buns, don't be afraid of a tighter pants size—and toss those cumbersome old boxer shorts right out the window, they make thongs for the manly man!  Don't be embarrassed to dress up as a horse for the office Halloween party.  Your costume won’t say "bridesmaid," it'll say "ride me"!